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!Mabel |
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Revision as of 21:30, 23 February 2015
This is a transcribed copy for the episode "The Legend of the Gobblewonker." Feel free to edit or add to this page as long as the information comes directly from the episode. |
Previous: "Tourist Trapped" | Next: "Headhunters" |
The episode opens to Dipper and Mabel at a table during breakfast. | |
Mabel | (Off screen, holding Sir Syrup) Are you ready for the ultimate challenge? |
Dipper | (Off screen, holding Mountie Man) I'm always ready! |
Mabel | Then you know what this means! |
Camera zooms out to show Mabel and Dipper holding their respective syrup bottles | |
Dipper & Mabel | Syrup race! (Tilt syrup bottles back and start to drip syrup into their mouths) Ahhh! |
Mabel | Go, Sir Syrup! |
Dipper | Go, Mounty Man! |
Dipper & Mabel | Go! Go! |
Dipper | Go! Go! |
Mabel | Almost... almost... (Taps the bottom of her bottle and the syrup drips onto her tongue) Yes! (Coughs repeatedly) I won! (Coughs more) |
Dipper | (Picks up and reads magazine) Ho ho, no way! Hey Mabel, check this out. |
Mabel | (Looking at ad in magazine) Human-sized hamster balls? (Gasps) I'm human-sized! |
Dipper | No, no, Mabel. This. (Points to a monster photo contest ad) We see weirder stuff than that every day! We didn't get any photos of those gnomes, did we? |
Mabel | Nope, just memories. And this beard hair. |
Dipper | Why did you save that? |
Mabel | (Shrugs and makes an "I dunno" sound) |
Stan | Good morning, knuckleheads. You two know what day it is? |
Dipper | Um... Happy anniversary? |
Mabel | Mazel tov! |
Stan | (Hits Dipper's head with a newspaper) It's Family Fun Day, genius! (Walks over to fridge and gets out milk) We're cuttin' off work and having one of those, you know, (sniffs milk in the refrigerator) bonding-type deals. |
Dipper | Grunkle Stan, is this gonna be anything like our last family bonding day? |
Flashback to Dipper and Mabel helping Grunkle Stan make counterfeit money | |
Stan | You call that Ben Franklin? He looks like a woman! (Hears police sirens) Uh-oh. |
Cut back to present) | |
Mabel | (Shudders) The county jail was so cold. |
Stan | All right, maybe I haven't been the best summer caretaker. But I swear, today we're gonna have some real family fun. Now who wants to put on some blindfolds and GET INTO MY CAR? |
Dipper & Mabel | YAY! |
Dipper | Wait, what? |
Cut to theme song. | |
Cut to a road in the forest. Grunkle Stan is driving his car with Dipper and Mabel blindfolded in the backseat. Stan leans down to adjust the radio and the tires screech. | |
Dipper | Woah woah! (Sighs) Blindfolds never lead to anything good. |
Mabel | Wow! I feel like all my other senses are heightened. I can see with my fingers! (Touches Dipper's face, making him laugh) |
Car jumps, making the twins fly into the doors. | |
Dipper | Woah! Grunkle Stan, are you wearing a blindfold? |
Stan | Ha ha, Nah, but with these cataracts I might as well be. What is that, a woodpecker? (Drives through a wooden guardrail, making the twins scream.) |
Cut to the lake. Dipper and Mabel, still blindfolded, are standing in front of the parked car, which now has branches and sticks caught in the grill. | |
Stan | Okay, okay. Open 'em up! |
Dipper and Mabel | (Take blindfolds off) |
Stan | Ta-da! It's fishin' season! |
Mabel | Fishing? |
Dipper | What're you playin' at, old man? |
Stan | You're gonna love it! The whole town's out here! |
Camera pans across the lake showing various townspeople doing different fishing activities. | |
Lazy Susan | (Waving pan) Here, fishy fishies! Get into the pan! |
Toby Determined | (Taking picture of man with large fish) Say cheese! (Takes picture, causing man to fal backwards into the lake) |
Manly Dan's son | Uh, is this good? (Holds up a fishing pole) |
Manly Dan | NO! (Takes the pole and breaks it in half) I'll show you how a real man fishes! (Grabs a fish straight out of water) Ha ha ha ha ha! (Throws fish on the floor of their boat and jumps on it, the punches it repeatedly) |
Manly Dan's sons | Dad! Dad! Dad! Dad! |
Tyler | Get 'em! Get 'em! |
Cut back to the Pines | |
Stan | That's some quality family bonding! |
Dipper | Grunkle Stan, why do you wanna bond with us all of a sudden? |
Stan | Come on, this is gonna be great! I've never had fishing buddies before. The guys from the lodge won't go with me: they don't "like" or "trust" me. |
Mabel | (To Dipper) I think he actually wants to fish with us. |
Stan | Hey, I know what'll cheer you sad sacks up. (Slaps hats on Dipper and Mabel) Pow! Pines family fishing hats! That-that's hand stitching, you know. |
The L on Mabel hat falls down | |
Stan | It's just gonna be you, me, and those goofy hats on a boat for ten hours! |
Dipper | Ten hours? |
Stan | I brought the joke book! (Holds up 1001 Yuk 'Em Ups) |
Dipper | No! NO! |
Mabel | There has to be a way out of this. |
Old Man McGucket | I SEEN IT! I SEEN IT AGAIN!! (Runs from dock, crashing into and overturning various things) The Gravity Falls Gobblewonker! Come quick before it scrabdoodles away! (Dances) |
Mabel | Awww... He's doing a happy jig! |
Old Man McGucket | NOOO! It's a jig of grave danger! |
Ranger McGucket | (Comes out and sprays Old Man McGucket with a spraybottle) Hey, hey! Now what did I tell you about scaring my customers? This is your last warning, Dad! |
Old Man McGucket | But I got proof this time, by gummity! |
Cut to dock | |
Old Man McGucket | (Points at boat) BEHOLD! It's the Gobble-dy-wonker what done did it! It had a long neck like a gee-raffe! And wrinkly skin like...like this gentleman right here! (Points to Stan) |
Stan | (Picking his ear) Huh? |
Old Man McGucket | It chawed my boat up to smitheroons, and shim-shammed over to Scuttlebutt Island! YOU GOTTA BELIEVE ME! |
Sheriff Blubs | Attention all units! We got ourselves a crazy old man! |
Everyone but the Pines and the ranger point and laugh at Old Man McGucket. | |
Ranger McGucket | (Shakes head) |
Old Man McGucket | (Walking off) Aww, donkey spittle! Aw, banjo polish! |
Stan | Well, that happened. Now let's untie this boat and get out on that lake! (Steps into his rowboat and starts untying it from the dock) |
Dipper | Mabel, did you hear what that old dude said? |
Mabel | (Mimicking Old Man McGucket) Aww, donkey shpittle! |
Dipper | The other thing. About the monster. If we can snag a photo of it, we can split the prize fifty-fifty. |
Mabel | (Gasps) That's two fifties! |
Dipper | Imagine what you could do with five. Hundred. Dollars! |
Mabel | (Imagines herself inside a human sized hamster ball in front of a hamster) Not so high and mighty anymore! |
Hamster | Aww... |
Mabel | (Rolling back and forth) Aha haha haha. Heehee (Crashes through the wall and rolls out onto the street and meets Xyler and Craz) Hey, boys! You can look, but ya can't touch. (When the light turns green, Mabel scurries down the street in her ball) Squeak, squeak, squeak, squeak! |
Xyler and Craz | Awesome! |
Dipper | (In real life, snapping fingers) Mabel! Mabel? |
Mabel | Dipper, I am one million percent on board with this! |
Dipper | Grunkle Stan! Change of plans: we're taking that boat to Scuttlebutt Island, and we're gonna find that Gobblewonker! |
Dipper and Mabel | Monster hunt! Monster hunt! |
Dipper, Mabel, and Old Man McGucket | Monster Hunt! |
Old Man McGucket | Monster... Eh... I'll go. |
A large honking sound is heard. | |
Soos | (Pulls up in his boat) You dudes say somethin' about a monster hunt? |
Mabel | Soos! |
Soos | Wassup, hambone! (Soos and Mabel fist bump and make explosion noises.) Dude, you could totally use my boat for your hunt. It's got a steering wheel, chairs; normal boat stuff. |
Stan | All right, all right, let's think this through. Ya kids could go waste your time on some epic monster-finding adventure, or you could spend the day learning how to tie knots and skewer worms with your Great Uncle Stan! |
The twins look at Soos in his boat; he does a robot dance. They look back at Stan in his leaky old boat; he sniffs his left armpit. They look at Scuttlebutt Island in the distance. They grin at each other. | |
Stan | So, whaddaya say? |
The twins drive off laughing with Soos in his boat toward Scuttlebutt Island, leaving Stan behind. | |
Mabel | We made the right choice! |
Soos | Yes! |
Stan | Ingrates! Aw, who needs 'em? I got a whole box of creepy fishing lures to keep me company. (After a moment of looking at the lure with flies buzzing around them, Stan cringes in disgust and closes the box) |
Cut to S.S. Cool Dude headed for the island. | |
Dipper | Hoist the anchor! |
Soos | (Pulls up cinderblock anchor) |
Dipper | Raise the flag! |
Mabel | (Holds up beach towel) We're gonna find that Gobblewonker! |
Dipper | We're gonna win that photo contest! |
Soos | Do any of you dudes have sunscreen? |
Dipper | We're gonna... Go get sunscreen! |
Mabel & Soos | Yay! (The boat does a U-turn away from the island. Underwater, a strange shape swims by.) |
Cut to black for commercial break. | |
The scene begins with Dipper pacing on the boat in front of Mabel and Soos. | |
Dipper | All right. If we wanna win this contest, we've gotta do it right! Think. What's the number one problem with most monster hunts? |
Soos | You're a side character, then you die within the first five minutes of the movie. Dude, am I a side character?! Do y'ever think about stuff like that? |
Dipper | No, no, no. Camera trouble! Say Bigfoot shows up. Soos, be Bigfoot? |
Soos | (Strikes a Bigfoot pose) |
Dipper | (In mock acting voice) There he is! Bigfoot! (Pats jacket) Uh-oh, no camera! (Pulls camera out of jacket) Oh, wait, here's one! Aw, no film! (In normal voice) You see? You see what I'm, doing...here? |
Soos | Oh, yeah. Dude's got a point. |
Dipper | That's why I bought SEVENTEEN disposable cameras! Two on my ankle, three in my jacket, four for each of you, three extras in this bag, and one...under my hat! There's no way we're gonna miss this. Okay everybody, let's test our cameras out! |
Soos | (Takes a picture of himself; the flash scares him) Aw, dude! (Throws the camera overboard) |
Dipper | You see? This is exactly why you need backup cameras. We still have sixteen! |
Mabel | (Throws a camera at a seagull flying over her head) Ah, bird! |
Dipper | Fifteen! Okay, guys, I repeat; don't lose your cameras! |
Soos | Wait, lose the cameras? |
Dipper | DON'T! |
Soos | Dude, I just threw two away. |
Dipper | Thirteen! All right! We still have thirteen camera-(He accidentally crushes one with his fist) Twelve. We have twelve cameras. |
Mabel | So what's the plan? Throw more cameras overboard or what? |
Dipper | NO! No. Okay. You'll be lookout, Soos can work the steering wheel, and I'll be captain. |
Mabel | What? Why do you get to be captain? What about Mabel, huh? Ma-bel! Ma-bel! Ma-bel! Ma-bel! |
Dipper | I'm not sure that's a good idea. |
Mabel | What about co-captain? |
Dipper | There's no such thing as co-captain. |
Mabel | Aw, whoops. (Tosses a camera into the water) |
Dipper | Okay, fine! You can be co-captain. |
Soos | Can I be associate co-captain? |
Mabel | As co-captain, I authorize that request. |
Dipper | Well, as first co-captain, our number one order of business is to lure the monster out with this. (Gestures at a barrel of Fish Food) |
Soos | Permission to taste some? |
Dipper | Granted. |
Mabel | Permission co-granted. |
Soos | Permission associate co-granted. (Licks some, than gags and wipes his tongue, coughing) Dude, I don't know what I expected that to taste like! |
Dipper and Mabel | (Laughing) |
Dipper | Oh, Soos... |
Stan | (Watching thenm) Traitors! Ah, I'll find my own fishing buddies! (Looks around and sees a couple sitting in a boat up ahead.) Ah! (Starts his boat's engine.) There's my new pals! |
Reginald | (Turned away from Rosanna, looking at a ring in a box. He takes a breath) Now that we're alone, Rosanna, there's a burning question which my heart longs to ask of you. |
Rosanna | (Tearing up) Oh, Reginald! |
Stan | Hey! (Pulls his boat up to theirs) Wanna hear a joke? Here goes. My ex-wife still misses me...but her aim is gettin' better! (Pauses) Her aim is gettin' better! (Another pause) Y'see, it's-it's funny because marriage is terrible. |
Reginald and Rosanna | (Row their boat away.) |
Stan | What? |
Cut to S.S. Cool Dude approaching Scuttlebutt Island. There is fog everywhere. Soos is at the back of the boat shoveling fish food over the side. Dipper and Mabel are at the front. Dipper is trying to see through the fog while Mabel is playing ventriloquist with a pelican. | |
Mabel | Hey! How's it going? (As Pelican) It's going awesome! Bow bow, buh bow bow! |
Dipper | Mabel, leave that thing alone. |
Mabel | (As Pelican) Aw, I don't mind none! (As Mabel) Hey, look, I'm drinking water! (As Pelican while drinking water) Twinkle, twinkle little...(Chokes on the water and coughs, and the pelican flies away.) |
Dipper | Aren't you supposed to be doing lookout? |
Mabel | Look out! (Throws a volley ball at Dipper, hitting him on the arm) |
Dipper | (Holds arm and shivers) |
Mabel | Heh, heh. But seriously, I'm on it. |
The boat jolts to a sudden stop having crashed into the shore of the island. | |
Mabel | See? We're here! I'm a lookout genius! Hamster ball, here we come! |
The trio disembarks and ventures into the foggy woods. Dipper leads the group while carrying a lantern. They soon come to a large sign nailed to a tree that says "Scuttlebutt Island." Soos and Mabel stop in front of it. | |
Soos | Dude, check it out. (Covers the "Scuttle" part of the sign) Butt Island. |
Mabel | Soos, you rapscallion! (To Dipper) Hey! Why aren't you laughing? Are you scared? |
Dipper | Pssh! Yeah, right! I'm not-- |
Mabel | (Pokes him on the nose and blows a raspberry) Yeah, you are! |
Dipper | Hey! (He drops the lantern as Mabel continues poking him and blowing raspberries) Quit...! Stop! Mabel! |
There's a growling noise in the distance. Mabel stops teasing Dipper and they look around. Soos comes up to them. | |
Soos | Dude, did you guys hear that? |
Mabel | What was that? Was it your stomach? |
Soos | Nah, my stomach normally sounds like whale noises. |
Mabel | (Listening to Soos' stomach, which makes whale noises.) Wow. So majestic! |
Possum | (Grabs lantern and runs away) |
Dipper | (Gasps) Our lantern! Aww! I can't see anything! |
Soos | Duuude, I dunno, man. Maybe this, uh... Maybe this isn't worth it. |
Dipper | Not worth it? Guys, imagine what would happen if we got that picture! |
Cut to Dipper's imagination, where he is dressed like Indiana Jones being interviewed on a talk show.) | |
Charlie | Tonight we're here with adventure seeker Dipper Pines, who bravely photographed the elusive Gobblewonker! Tell me, Dipper: what's the secret to your success? |
Dipper | Well, I run away from nothing. (Dumps coffee into mouth; An embarrassing picture of Grunkle Stan appears on screen.) Nothing, except for when I ran away from my annoying Grunkle Stan, who I ditched in order to pursue that lake monster. |
Charlie | How right you were to do so. He looked like a real piece of work. I don't often do this, but I feel the need to give you an award! (Gives him a medal and they get their picture taken.) |
Mabel | (Crashes through the wall in a hamster ball) CHARLIE! WHY WON'T YOU INTERVIEW ME?! (Chases after Dipper and Charlie, screaming like a maniac.) |
Cut back to real life | |
Dipper | (Real life, smiles) I'm in! |
Mabel | (Also smiling) Me, too! |
Dipper and Mabel | Run off |
Soos | All right, dudes, I'm comin'! (Chases them) |
Soos | (Beatboxing) |
Mabel | My name is Mabel! It rhymes with table! It also rhymes with... glabel! It also rhymes with... schmabel! |
Soos | Dude, we should be writing these down. |
Dipper | (Holding a camera) Guys, guys, guys! You hear something? |
The growling noise from earlier can be heard; a flock of birds flies overhead, away from the sound. | |
Dipper | This is it! This is it! |
Dipper and Mabel | (Punching each other excitedly and walking towards the sound) Yes yes yes! Hoo hoo hoo! |
Soos | (Grabs a stick and follows them into the fog) |
Walking through the fog, Soos stops the group when he spots a lake monster silhouette. The group ducks behind a log. | |
Dipper | Everyone: Get your cameras ready! |
Dipper, Mabel, and Soos | (Turn cameras on.) |
Dipper | Ready? GO! |
Soos yells and jumps over the log, holding his camera in front of him as he runs toward the silhouette, snapping photos at random. The twins follow him, but as they get closer, they discover the silhouette was the remains of a wrecked boat with beavers living on it. | |
Beaver 1 | (Subtitled) I love cavorting! |
Beaver 2 | (Subtitled) That deserves a hug! (Hugs Beaver 1) |
Beaver 3 | (Thumps tail and walks sideways of the boat.) |
Dipper | But...but what was that noise, then? I heard a monster noise! |
The "monster noise" sounds again. It turns out to be a beaver chewing on, and sometimes activating, a rusty old chainsaw. | |
Soos | Sweet! Beaver with a chainsaw. (Takes pictures of it.) |
Dipper | Maybe that old guy was crazy after all. |
Mabel | He did use the word "scrapdoodle." |
Dipper | (Sighs.) |
Cut to Stan teaching Hank's son how to thread a line. | |
Stan | Look, when you're threadin' the line--lot of people don't know this--but you wanna use a barrel knot. (Whispering) That's a secret from one fishing buddy to another! Heh heh. |
Hank's son | Uh, I, uh, who are you, exactly? |
Stan | Just call me your GRUNKLE STAN! |
Hank's wife | Sir, SIR, SIR! Why are you talking to our son? If you don't leave right now, I'm calling the police! |
Stan | Ha ha, you see, the thing about that is... (Starts his motor and speeds away) |
Hank's Wife | Go bother your own kids! |
Cut back to Scuttlebutt Island. | |
Soos | (Taking pictures of a beaver posing on a stump.) Ooh, yeah! Work it! Work it! Nice! Nice! Gimme another one of those! Yeah, I like that one. |
Dipper | What're we gonna say to Grunkle Stan? We ditched him over nothing. (Throws a stone into the lake and sighs. The rock Dipper is sitting on shakes.) Hey... guys, do you feel that? (The rocks sinks under the water and Dipperm swims to shore.) Hey, hey, whoa, whoa! |
The Gobblewonker's silhouette is seen swimming away. | |
Mabel | Ahhh! |
Dipper | This is it! (Takes pictures) Come on! This is our chance! (Soos and Mabel back up) What's wrong with you guys? |
Gobblewonker | (Swims back towards the island and begins to rise as the other speak.) |
Mabel | Dipper...? |
Soos | Dude...? |
Dipper | It's not that hard, all right? All you gotta do is point, and shoot. Like this! (Aims camera at Gobblewonker and realizes it's right in front of him.) |
Gobblewonker | (Roars, causing Dipper to drop his camera and the three to run away.) |
Soos | Run! |
The Gobblewonker pushes a tree over which falls and almost hits Dipper and Mabel, but Dipper lunges and Mabel and they roll out of the way. The continue to run and ndodge falling trees and eventually catch up with Soos. | |
Soos | Get back to the boat! HURRY! (The Gobblewonker snaps at Mabel who hops onto Soos's back) |
Dipper | (Aims camera at Gobblewonker, but trips over a root, stopping the camera.) The picture! (Starts to run to the camera.) |
Soos | (Grabs Dipper.) Dude, if it makes you feel any better, I got tons of pictures of those beavers, dude! |
Dipper | WHY WOULD THAT MAKE ME FEEL BETTER?! |
Commercial break. | |
Open with the group running towards the boat. Soos helps the others on, the climbs in himself. Soos's presence pushes the boat back into the water and he runs towards the helm. | |
Soos | Let's get outta here, dudes! (They start driving away in the boat backwards.) |
Dipper | All right! This is it! (Tries to take a picture.) Cracked lens?! Soos! Get a photo! |
Soos | (Throwing cameras at the monster) |
Dipper | WHAT ARE YOU DOING?! |
Soos | Oh! I still got one left! Don't worry, dude! (Throws a camera to Dipper but misses hitting the wall and breaking the camera.) |
The Gobblewonker dives into the water and begins to chase the gang. Soos steers the ship forwards and drives away from it. | |
Dipper | Go, go, go, go, go! |
Cut to Stan on his boat, struggling to tie a knot. | |
Stan | Er, ugh, gah! Mollycoddling... |
Shmipper | (In a boat a few yards away with his sister and Grandpa.) Can you pwease tell me mo'e funny stories, Pop Pop? |
Pop Pop | Anything for my fishing buddies! (Laughs and pats grandchildren on their heads) |
Stan | (Growls) |
Shmipper | Pop Pop? I just weewized dat...I wuv you. |
Stan | Aw, come on! Boo! Boo! |
Pop Pop | Hey, now! What's the big idea? |
Shmipper | Maybe he has no one who wuvs him, Pop Pop. |
Stan | Yeah, well, I... I... |
S.S. Cool Dude drives past him and soaks him. He throws his hat to the ground in frustration, then sits down and sighs. | |
Dipper | SOOS! BEAVERS! |
Beavers | (Subtitled) We're still beavers. |
The boat crashes into the old, broken boat and beavers fly everywhere, biting the boat and the crew. | |
Soos | Ah, beavers! Oh, no! |
Beavers are biting Dipper's hat. Mabel shakes a beaver off of her arm, and a beaver lunges at Soos, who stumbles away from the wheel. Mabel takes control on the wheel, steering away from the Gobblewonker. Dipper tries to dislodge a beaver from the side of the boat while Soos runs in circles crying in pain from the beaver still on his face. Dipper throws beavers towards the Gobblewonker who dives and continues to chase them under the water. The S.S. Cool Dude drives through a place with people fishing, who are overturned by the Gobblewonker behind them. | |
Cut to Manly Dan and his sons, Dan headlocking a fish and his sons cheering for him | |
Manly Dan | (With a fish) Headlock! |
Sons | Dad! Dad! Dad! |
Their boat is turned over by a wave from the Gobblewonker. Fish start raining down on them.. | |
Manly Dan | The fishes! They seek revenge! Swim, boys! SWIM! |
Cut back to the S.S. Cool Dude. The Gobblewonker swipes at the boat and manages to knock the control cabin off. | |
Mabel | Aah! Look out! |
Man | (Transporting a glass sheet over the water with Man 2 by boat) Easy...Easy... |
The boat drives through it and breaks it. | |
Man 2 | My glass! |
Mabel | (Sees dead-end ahead.) WHERE DO I GO?! |
Dipper | (Looks around. Takes out Journals and flips through pages.) Um...uh...GO INTO THE FALLS! I think there might be a cave behind there! |
Mabel | MIGHT BE?! |
They all scream and the boat goes through the waterfall and into cave behind. Their boat crashes, sending them into the dirt. The all stand up, and turn around to see the Gobblewonker swim in after them and get stuck in the cave entrance) | |
Mabel | It's stuck! |
Dipper | Ha ha! Yeah! Wait...It's stuck? (Tries to find a camera but he has none) |
Mabel | (Lifts Dipper's hat to reveal he still has one last camera) Boop. |
Dipper | (Laughs and takes shots of the robot) |
Mabel | Didja get a good one? |
Dipper | THEY'RE ALL GOOD ONES! (Hugs her) |
Mabel | WOO! HAMSTER BALL! |
The Gobblewonker, still roaring, gets hit by a rock. It's head falls down with an electric noise. | |
Dipper | What the...? (Walks up to the Gobblewonker and touches its side) Huh? |
Mabel | What's wrong? |
Dipper steps on the gobblewonker and knocks it. It makes a hollow metalic sound. Dipper climbs up the Gobblewonker. | |
Soos | Careful, dude! |
Dipper | I've got this! Hold on! (Climbs over the Gobblewonker, then pops up from the other side.) Hey, guys! Come check this out! |
The gang discovers a handle and turns it, causing steam to come out. They open the trapdoor causing more steam to come out. They discover old man McGucket inside controlling a machine. | |
Old Man McGucket | Work the bellows and the...Eh? Aww, banjo polish! |
Dipper | Wha- Yo- You?! You made this? W-w-why? |
Old Man McGucket | Well, I...I, uh...I just wanted attention. |
Dipper | I still don't understand. |
Old Man McGucket | Well, first I just hootenannied up a biomechanical brain wave generator, and then I learned to operate a stick-shift with ma beard! |
Mabel | Okay, yeah. But why did you do it? |
Old Man McGucket | Well, when you get to be an old fella like me, nobody pays any attention to you anymore. (Flashback of McGucket outside his son's window with a baseball and gloves and his son, inside his office, closing his blinds. Real time, narrating) My own son hasn't visited me in months! (Flashback moves to McGucket building the Gobblewonker. Real time, narrating) So I figured maybe I'd catch his fancy with a fifteen ton aquatic robut! (Laughs like maniac and the flashback ends. Sighs.) In retrospect, it seems a bit contrived. You just don't know the length us old-timers go through for a little quality time with our family. |
Dipper and Mabel | (Look at the fishing hats Grunkle Stan gave them and sigh) |
Soos | Dude. I guess the real lake monster is you two. Heh, heh! Sorry, that just like--boom--just popped into my head there. |
Mabel | So, did you ever talk to your son about how you felt? |
Old Man McGucket | No, sir, I got to work straight on the robut! (A projector shows blueprints for the Gobblewonker on the trapdoor) I made lots of robuts in my day! (Pushes button and projectors shows a newspaper with a robot pterodactyl breathing fire on a town and the word "chaos".) Like when my wife left me and I created a homicidal pterodactyl-tron, (Pushed button again and projectors shows a picture of Ernie) or when my pal Ernie didn't come to my retirement party (Pushed button agains and projector shows another newspaper with a large robot terrorizing a town and the word "disaster") and I constructed an eighty ton SHAME BOT THAT EXPLODED THE ENTIRE DOWNTOWN AREA! (Laughs like a maniac) Well, time to get back to work on my death ray! (Ducks into the Gobblewonker and construction noises can be heard from inside. Raises hand in a grabbing motion) Any of you kids got a screwdriver? |
Dipper | (Takes out camera.) Well, so much for the photo contest. |
Mabel | You still have one roll of film left. |
Dipper | Whaddaya wanna do with it? |
Cut back to Stan driving back towards the shore. | |
Stan | (Looking defeated, sighs.) |
Dipper | Hey! Over here! (Drives by on the beat-up S.S. Cool Dude and both boats stop. Takes a photo of Stan) |
Stan | What the- Kids? I thought you two were off playing "Spin the Bottle" with Soos! |
Dipper | Well, we spent all day trying to find a "legendary" dinosaur. |
Mabel | But, we realized, the only dinosaur we wanna hang out with is right here. |
Stan | Save your sympathy! I've been having a great time withoutcha'! Makin' friends, talkin' to my reflection- I had a run-in with the lake police! Guess I gotta wear this ankle bracelet now, so that'll be fun. |
Dipper | So...I guess there isn't room in that boat for three more? |
Stan | (Glares at Dipper and Mabel) |
Dipper and Mabel | (Put on their hats.) |
Stan | (Expression softens up.) You knuckleheads ever seen me thread a hook with my eyes closed? |
Dipper | Five bucks says you can't do it! |
Stan | You're on! (Dipper climbs into the Stanowar.) |
Mabel | Five more bucks says you can't do it with your eyes closed, plus me singing at the top of my lungs! |
Stan | I like those odds! (Mabel and Soos climb into the Stanowar. To Soos) Whoa! What happened to your shirt? |
Soos | Long story, dude. |
Dipper | All right, everybody get together. Say fishing! |
Mabel and Stan | Fishing! |
Soos | (Steps into the picture, but only his belly shows.) Dude, am I in the frame? |
Photo montage: The picture of Stan and Mabel smiling and Soos' belly; A picture of Mabel covering Stan's eyes while he peeks and tries to thread a hook; Stan reading jokes while Mabel and Soos laugh; Dipper holding his first fish; Stan posing with his hand in his vest; Stan and Mabel stealing fish from Smabel and her grandfather; Dipper, Mabel, and Stan driving away from the lake police. | |
The gang are on a boat. The boat shakes. | |
Mabel | Whoa! |
Dipper | What was that? |
Mabel | (Shrugs) |
Underwater, a disposable cameras sinks. The real Gobblewonker swims by and eats it. | |
End credits. | |
Mabel | (Playing ventriloquist with the pelican) Who wants to hear a joke? |
Dipper | Not me. |
Mabel | (As Pelican) Heh, heh! Yeah, ya do! Here it goes: why did the pelican get kicked out of the restaurant? |
Dipper | I don't care! |
Mabel | (Pelican voice) 'Cuz he had a very big bill! La la la la! Yuk yuk yuk! Blah blah bloo! Yay! Hurray! |
Dipper | Ugh, boo. Bad joke. Bad pelican joke. |
(Episode ends) |