User blog:MermaidatHeart/Merteens Episode 3- Heads or Scales

(Comes out onto the stage with the curtains still drawn.)

Hello. Before we begin this episode of Merteens, I have a terrible annoucement to make. TUCKYD.. (Sniff, sniff) IS DEAD!!!

(Audience gasps.)

(No, Tuckyd's not dead. I just came across this and cracked up. http://gravityfalls.wikia.com/wiki/User_blog:Totally_me245/Tuckyd%27s_Toilet_Funeral,%28Performed_by_the_fabulous_TM%29_:D#comm-59152)

Enjoy this episode.

(Opens to Courtney playing “Crazy Eights” with Liam)

Liam: (Puts down a Jack of Spades) You know, you might as well give up by now. We both have one card left.

Courtney: (Does her famous “I hate you” eye roll) EIGHT.

Liam: WHAT?!!!

Courtney: YES!!!! I WIN!!!

Madison: (Enters) Yeah, yeah, fun’s over.

Courtney: (Frowns) What happened?

Roxy: (Enters) What HAPPENED?! My life in this tropical paradise is RUINED!!!!

Madison: It’s even worse than that, Roxy.

Jessica: (Enters drinking Pitt Cola) Why is it when I’m watching Why You Ackin’ So Cray-Cray you guys are yelling and freaking out?

Roxy: BELLA NOVA HAS MOVED TO THE HUMAN TOWN!!!

Madison: THE HUMAN GOVERNMENT HAS CAUUGHT FOOTAGE OF OUR TAILS ON CAMERA!!!!

Jessica: (Does a spit take on Courtney) WHAT?!!!!!!

Courtney: EWWWWW, JESSICA!!! (Grows her tail and groans)

Liam: Roxy, let me get this straight, Bella Nova, your arch enemy from school, is now living in the human town?

Roxy: (Nods with a horrified look on her face)

<p class="MsoNormal">Liam: And we’re just SITTING HERE?! Come on! (Grabs Roxy’s wrist and pulls her out of the room)

<p class="MsoNormal">Jessica: Wait! I’m coming with you! (Runs out with them)

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: (Turns to Courtney) Well? You going with them?

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: Does it LOOK like I can?

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: (Mumbles) Right.

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: Seriously, though, how’d the human government get footage of our TAILS? I thought they stayed away from Sanibel.

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: So did I. But I was hanging out on the dock in the human town, and one of those stupid human government agent was bragging about how he’d ‘changed history forever’ because he’d spotted a mermaid on camera. AND, even worse, it was the FIVE of us!

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: (Drying her tail) Shouldn’t we tell someone? One of the grown-up merpeople, they could take care of it, right?

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: No, NO ONE can know that they got footage of us! If they do… (Cringes) We might be kicked off the island. Humans aren’t SUPPOSED to know about mermaids, after all!

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: So, what do we do? Just hope it will MAGICALLY disappear?

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: No. We get RID of it.

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: And how exactly do you plan on doing that?

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: I have NO idea.

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: (Does her famous “I hate you” eye roll)

<p class="MsoNormal">Dakota: (Enters) BUT, the great Dakota is here to save the day!!!!

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: AAAH! (Covers her tail, then realizes it’s Dakota.) DUDE, Dakota! Code AQUA! (Code Aqua means someone has a tail.)

<p class="MsoNormal">Dakota: Oh, sorry. Lemme take care of that. (Grabs a laser ray and hits Courtney’s tail with it. She grows her legs again.)

<p class="MsoNormal">Courtney: (Gasps) Oh my gods. How’d you DO that?

<p class="MsoNormal">Dakota: It’s called a heat ray. (Blows on it) I’ve got plenty of other weapons we can use on our, DUN DUN, (Whispers) MISSION.

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: This isn’t a movie, Dakota. Explain.

<p class="MsoNormal">Dakota: Isn’t it obvious? We hafta SNEAK into the human government’s office, find the footage, and get rid of it!

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: Without getting caught? I seriously doubt it.

<p class="MsoNormal">Dakota: Which is WHY I bought THESE. (Holds up black jumpsuits and hats) We’re going, DUN DUN, UNDERCOVER.

<p class="MsoNormal">Madison: (Braking the fourth wall) This is gonna be a looooooong half hour.

<p class="MsoNormal">(Cuts to theme song)

<p class="MsoNormal">(Cuts to Liam, Jessica, and Roxy walking in the human town.)

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: Alright. Just BLEND in.

<p class="MsoNormal">Jessica: Ooooooh, a shirt with a puppy surfboarding on it! (Grabs it. But at the same time, another hand appears.)

<p class="MsoNormal">Girl: OMG, I wanted that!

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: (Gasp) It’s YOU.

<p class="MsoNormal">Girl: No, NOT Roxy Jones! (Groans)

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: Yes, that’s RIGHT, Bella. I’M here, in this PERFECT tropical paradise, and you’re RUNING it!

<p class="MsoNormal">Bella: Um, how am I running it?

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: First off, my COUSIN wants that, so LET GO of it.

<p class="MsoNormal">Jessica: Uhhhhh, actually-

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: Not helping. (Turns to Bella) Bella, I’LL tell you why you’re not welcome here. Because the MONSTERS don’t want you here.

<p class="MsoNormal">Bella: Wh-what monsters?

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: I’ll let you in on a little something. Deep in these very oceans, there are TERRYFYING sea creatures. They HATE it when a NEWCOMER swims in their sea. AND, the WORST part, if those people stay for long, there’s a certain chance of... hm? How do you put it? (Whispers) DEATH.

<p class="MsoNormal">Bella: DEATH?

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: Mm-hm. And I’d hate to see you die, Bella…

<p class="MsoNormal">Bella: Wha- I don’t believe you! You’re just trying to trick me into LEAVING. There are NO sea creatures in the ocean, and I’ll prove it to you! (Storms off)

<p class="MsoNormal">Liam: (Starts clapping. Sarcastically) BRAAAAAAAVO, Roxy Jones. You deserve to win an Oscar from that great acting. Seriously, though, Bella’s gonna be out in the sea. HOW precisely is your little plan going to WORK?

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: WE’RE merpeople. We should figure it out!

<p class="MsoNormal">(Silence)

<p class="MsoNormal">Jessica: Oooh! Oooh! I know! MAKEUP.

<p class="MsoNormal">Liam: OH, NO. OH, NO. That is NOT happening. LIAM JONES, son of Timothy Jones, will NOT wear makeup. Period.

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: Alright, I’ll make a deal with you. YOU put on makeup, and I’LL… uh… do something for you.

<p class="MsoNormal">Liam: (Smirks) YOU will play a game of football with me. Every hour I wear that stuff will cost you ONE game.

<p class="MsoNormal">Roxy: DEAL. (They shake hands.)

<p class="MsoNormal">Jessica: TO THE MAKEUP SHOP!!! (Skips off. Liam and Jessica follow her.)

<p class="MsoNormal">(More coming soon...)