Board Thread:Site Problems and Appearance/@comment-4854965-20141204205127/@comment-25094659-20141204224837

Mr B Natural wrote:

MinecraftPercabeth wrote: Maybe (To Wendy) could be (To Wendy:). That's how I've always seen it, and it makes gramatical sense to me :) I am actually the only person I've ever seen write it like that (other than you). You must have just seen the transcripts I edited. And I like it because it makes a distinction on whether the action affects their speech. For example, [(Whispering:) Dipper! Look!] which would be whispering that dialogue, as opposed to [(Whispering) Dipper! Look!] which would be whispering something, then saying the dialogue.

Again, I strongly disagree to putting any actions that are not the character's own into the speech boxes. It makes it sound like Mabel caused Wompers to bleat and squeal.

I would never put two separate parentheses-ed statements next to each other, like you did with (Sees Wendy in golf cart) (to Wendy). In would just put them in the same parentheses, separated by a semicolon. (Sees Wendy in golf cart; to Wendy:). It's much cleaner looking and easier to understand; otherwise you'd have people separating every action into different parentheses. (Mabel crosses out, "YOU STINK") (She writes "you look nice today" in its place) (She laughs)

And I think that the left column is for names only, not for anything else, ever. There's no reason that narrating should be different from any other action (writing, whispering, etc.) so it does not deserve its own seat in the left column apart from the other actions. Also, you would have to add a whole extra line just for the character narrating and then speaking in-universe.

!Dipper (Narrating)


 * I'd seen enough



!Dipper


 * Mabel! We need to talk about Norman!



Why not just have:

!Dipper


 * (Narrating:) I'd seen enough. (To Mabel:) Mabel! We need to talk about Norman!

I agree with the colons, the all-in-one-parantheses, and the Narrating. As for the sounds...

I don't think sounds and simple actions need their own boxes. I don't think it makes it sound like that person caused it as long as you use their name. It's gramatically independent.